We've Got The Strongest Balls of Them All

Sometimes I bitch and moan about a lot.  Issues at the job (damned chupacabras), getting pulled over three times in a week (damn the man!), or the fact that I have to share my name with a gay pornstar (why do you always have to catch???). 

 

But then there are guys, who are comfortably married for 20+ years, who live quiet lives and are in bed by 8pm.  These guys have lives Miss Daisy dreams about - calm existences with nice white picket fences.  That is, until the wife gets pissed and rips off your balls with her cruel bare hand.  Think about it - you are about to go to bed, and you think honeybunch is about to hook you up with your third blowjob this decade - but her knees aren't bending reverently, and her fingernails dig into your sack as her hand turns into a claw.  Next thing you know you are in the back of an ambulance with the seasoned pedimedics all seizing and cringing in vicarious agony.

 

Howard, as our poor friend is known - will be back looking for a new wife soon, thanks to some excellent reattachment surgery and morphine. His wife is deservedly in jail. 

 

This just goes to show that modern medicine truly only cares about men.  While there is no cure for breast cancer or PMS, doctors today can easily repair chopped penises and ripped off scroctums - not to mention erectile dysfuntion is a thing of the past.  Take that Gloria Steinem.