Sexytime Relationship Management(SRM) - Hot and Cold

Last Friday I planned to have a busy night. I scheduled a happy hour at Fox and Hounds near my place at 6pm, and then planned to take out a cute blonde for a night of salsa dancing and drinks at 8:30pm. The blonde was meant to be working late on Friday so I didn't invite her to the happy hour. That worked out because we only met recently, and I invited another girl (Blonde #2) I had a passing interest instead.

Of course, these things rarely work out as planned. Blonde #2 arrived a bit late, and with a few friends in tow. Great conversation, good food, and good friends all around assured that it would be a fun night. Then I got a text message from Blonde #1 that she was arriving at my place a full 90 minutes ahead of schedule. Well, this could get awkward. I excused myself and left briefly to drive the three minutes to my condo to pick up my date for the night. When I found her, she was attired in a pretty satin dress and was looking very impressive. I gave her a kiss on the cheek, lightly joked about her early arrival - and informed her we would be at a bar for an hour or so. She wasn't happy about being overdressed, but she was fine with it.

Arriving back at Fox and Hounds, I made an effort to introduce Blonde #1 to most of the group, while Blonde #2 was engaged with my friends and her own. I lavished attention on Blonde #1, and when appropriate, I visited Blonde #2 and lavished attention on her - and make sure to kiss her cheek before I left with Blonde #1.

As the night went on (as dancing turned into drunken writhing), I wondered how I could have better handled that situation. Blonde #2 was always a bit unreliable, so I didn't worry too much about upsetting her. Yet, had I had more of an advanced relationship with B2 - I would have been in trouble.

I typically can handle these sorts of situations on my own, but this time I needed help from Taki. Just recently he posted an article that seemed to be spot on.

But not everybody who uses chat-up lines is a playboy, otherwise you’d have 50 million Italian playboys and ten million Greek ones. Show me an Italian or a Greek man who doesn’t flirt and I’ll show you a pervert. Flirting has never ruined a marriage or driven a wife to drink. Coldness does that. Men who flirt usually service their wives regularly, and everyone else they can get hold of. (italics mine)

The coldness piece caught my attention. I find it is easy to flirt with a whole group of women, as long as I am careful not to neglect any of them. I also realized that most women (and men for that matter) tend to realize their partner is cheating once he starts becoming cold towards her. It also explains how Magic Johnson can get HIV from sleeping around, yet his wife still goes through the effort of condoms and frequent check-ups just so she can have sex with her adulterous husband. The now insane Britney Spears didn't dump K-Fed because he knocked her up and spent her money (and most likely cheated on her) ... he became cold to her. Even in my experience, I dated a girl in Indiana who didn't mind if I slept with other women because she knew how much I hungered for her. And she wouldn't even allow herself the same freedom.

So according to Taki, the only thing I could have done better is to make sure that both women knew I deeply desired them, and to even suggest marriage... although I won't go that far.

The article goes on to give even more tips on how to be a better playboy, chief of which is to be generous. Unfortunately, playboys don't have the cultural impact they had in the past - after all, one must be rich to be a playboy. It is much cheaper to be a player/playa... and being a pimp don't cost nuthin'.